Friday 25 April 2008

Muted Celebration

Its finally over. I'm an engineer today. But its only bitter sweet at best. The euphoria of having completed my graduation is being shadowed by a numbing pain of having to part. From my dearest of friends, my department and my college.
Come the last few days and we all seem to be normal. Still nothing is happening. Sorry. I dont think so. It just doesn't show. Deep within we all fear the day when we'll have to leave behind a place and friends with whom/which we bonded like nothing else in life. Its the end of a tumultous 4 year journey but its only the sweet memories are left behind. That makes it even worse. Agonizing.
The night before the day before ECC exam. I'm sitting in the main building reading room. (Forget all the scornful looks that you get for being a final yr student in the reading room.) I just could not read. Memories come rushing to me... a time when I met somebody in the main lobby... some incident which was ever so insignificant now weighs so heavily on mind. Its forms a knot in my throat I cant swallow. I walk out and go for a stroll towards the college gate, along the dimly lit road. I plug into some light music to lighten things up. It just doesn't fit. I dont minding listen to some really sentimental kannada song now playing over the FM. Its soothing. Its comforting. I sit down and turn back towards the main building... Man!
I've been doing every other chore of my daily routine with a heightened sense of awareness. The last time I'll be entering ATB. The last time that I'll be writing an exam. The last time I'll be eating at NFC.. The last time... Its not all the musical for someone near me to hear that. But I dont care. I know it hardly matters
And finally the day has arrived. The ineveitable. Its almost nothing until I go to bid Amod farewell. He hugs me tightly... For just an instant longer... one fleeting moment. And it all comes tumbling down on me. I try to push him away in an attempt to fight back the up surge of emotions that I was not prepared for. He looks away. Its all too much.

3 comments:

Logik said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Logik said...

oh-so-awesomely put.
last days were a bit too much. that constant twang...

And amod has hugged[ twisted, contorted] me so many times, that all those gushing emotions seems to have stuck in my throat.
I'm choking......

Why .. why.. why

Carpe Diem... said...

this was a very touchin article put in beautifully to catch the essence of tht dreaded departure.....i know how hard it can be.......time goes on like an endless tide but there's fresher spring of grasses green...of new set horizons tht r goin to tk u miles.......newer pastures...newer friends...newer experiences thts gonna make you strong...but the ol' sweet memories shall linger on...on...n on....